From the Innsmouth Observer

 

Shock Ban on Skipping
at Lavinia Whateley Primary School.

According to sources who are nameless, the inexplicable ban on skipping in pre-primary classes at Lavinia Whateley Primary School is attracting attention from the highest levels including the City Fathers and the Elders Committee of the Obed Marsh Memorial Swimming Club.

Ringo West, biology master and spokesperson of the school said, "The halt to skipping is purely temporary and is only in place until beach sand can be placed in the junior playground to prevent injuries due to falls. We expect this matter to be resolved by the next full moon next week."

The temporary halt to skipping on the Lavinia Whateley Primary School will be lifted, says Ringo West. "We believe that skipping is good for the development of children and perfectly natural."

"The rumors that the ban was put in place by the new Headmistress of the Kindergarten should not be believed," he continued.

Asked about her absence, West explained, "The stress of her relocation from Idaho took its toll upon her weak, mortal frame and so, she was given a brief period of leave. I had a conversation with her last week, and she was animated about prospects for her young charges and eager to resume her duties."

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